Today, a friend did a rune/tarot reading for me around an issue that was swirling for me. Afterwards we sat in big easy chairs and talked deep soulful talk. I haven’t seen her since before the lockdown and it felt like manna from heaven to connect with one of my soul friends.
I left her home feeling as clear as a bell and my phone spontaneously started playing Snatam Kaur’s Long Time Sun – which I haven’t heard in a few years. It felt magical, peaceful, and centering. It reminded me of the gift of connection with another, through another, and within oneself. Joyous.
Our conversation danced, twisted, and turned and touched on a myriad of topics. We talked about the nature of making decisions, living our cosmology, prayer, asking and receiving and more.
Making decisions came up in a session that I did recently for someone too and I realize it is probably ripe for many people as we emerge out of our pandemic cocoons.
For conscious types, decision making can be tricky. We are raised to be rational and logical and make decisions based on available information and data. Some of us weren’t raised to trust our guts, intuition, or nighttime dreams but we’ve learned to rely on these as well. The tricky part comes when they seemingly collide or, for me, when fear comes up and my heart and head are in debate.
When this happens, I have to remind myself to slow down and take some time for the right path to emerge. We need to sink down until we hear the thump and know deep within us about the next step to take trusting that it will unfold beautifully even though we can’t see around the corner.
Sometimes, just putting the question out into the universe helps guide our way to clarity. For example, I’ve been noodling with this decision for a good month and made an appointment with my friend last week. Over the weekend, I knew what I wanted to do. Our session today helped create an empowering context around that choice for me and feel the alignment of it. And it’s such a gift to triangulate with another to open a portal when our own inner voice is clouded by fear or strong emotion.
I have always been taken care of and have dozens of examples of alignment with Spirit - the right person turning up at the right time or my prayers being answered. And yet, I don’t live like I can rely on the magic of spirit showing up in the same way that I rely on my car to start in the morning or the kettle to boil.
There is always that little dance between asking for what we want or need, seeing it manifest in beautiful or odd and unusual ways, and knowing that there are times when our prayers seemingly aren’t answered, and we have to grow into the situation. And I have to assume that it’s all just perfect.
Sometimes the choice is a little different. We might have an ache or pain and find ourselves worrying about it. We wonder if we’re becoming anxious and worrying unnecessarily or if this is something that we should pay attention to.
In this instance, deep down we know. We know when something is off or just not right for our bodies and sometimes, we step over it at our peril. So, we can listen to that gut instinct and either take action or, if we sense that it’s a rabbit warren of distractive emotions, we can remind ourselves that life is short, and we can either spend it worrying or put it one side and relish in life.
I also wanted to share a practice that a friend told me about. She has been meeting with a group of 6 women for several decades. She told me that whenever one of them was struggling with a decision they would share it with the group via email and the goal was for the other women to come up with 10 different possible responses for her. I love it because it takes us out of ‘this or that’ thinking.
I’m hoping that some of this musing is helpful for you. I plan on starting a series of articles in the coming weeks based on what emerged for me while walking the Camino.
With love
Jana